An agrarian kind of thing, with my back in the sun and my hands in the dirt, standing erect, curiously turning my head when I notice the wind change directions, and honestly having reason to be curious about the weather, as it would directly effect my circumstance.

Unlike now, when wind direction is something I certainly don’t notice, and most times, the weather ends up being, for awhile, …just something that’s out there in walks between the buildings.

So I’ve been working and studying in these buildings for more than a couple of years now, preparing for a life spent in the pursuit of career that aids in the selling of toaster ovens, in particular making spiffy little toaster oven advertisements. I can make them more attractive. Of sorts. I guess. Honestly there has been some pride involved in such a skill, and as of late I’ve been laughing about it, about the triviality of trivial things -- Good ads, attractive ones, somewhat stylish soothing toaster oven ads. -- Even packaging.

Even if yours is ok and it works just fine, you’ll still need this new one because its new and improved; its 30% more free, and 25% off, and if nothing else the cardboard box that it comes in, ..well its really stylish and stuff too.

I do that.
I should be proud.
Or something.

For once maybe it would be fun to be one of those non-toaster oven people who toast bread outside, on some kind of fire, because I think those kind of people have more fun.

Fun, ..maybe even having the skill of making my own bread, before the possibility of toast even enters the equation.

No, not even with one of those stylish bread making machines.

Spring has been here for awhile and it is neither hot out there nor cold out there, outside. It’s really nice. I’ve wanted to be outside more, and or abandon my two jobs and my schooling to go for a 14-month camping trip on the $52 that I’ve got saved up.

I’m reminded of something I read in a magazine I found at the book store in Hot Springs that had lots of books but that obviously also sold magazines:

It’s deeper than the “been there, done that” attitude we use to impress each other with when recounting how many adventures we cram into our weekends and vacations. It’s a contentment achieved from following through with our truest desires and most compelling challenges. Our experiences accumulate and make us who we are. We are constantly becoming the sum-total of all the events in our lives and, in my view, any time spent in the wilderness makes a nice addition to that total.

I spend way too much time not outside. I think that sums it up.
I keep telling myself but I don’t ever do anything about it.

Kevin Sites

Mondays are um, shall we say, ..full.

On this particular Monday I woke at 8:30, drove away from the house at 8:40, making a stop for me and DeAnja’s food at the Donut Hole. Its in between the barber shop and the tanning salon. I get mine and hers breakfast of donuts, there, on Mondays and Wednesdays, eat mine while driving to my 9 o’clock class, and leave hers in the truck to be heated by the morning sun before she gets there for her ten o’clock. Class.

So that takes care of the waking up and driving to school and eating part, between 8:30 and 9:00.

On this Monday, in class we finished dissecting our pigs. You lay them on their backs and tie them spread-eagle, and cut them from chin to groin, and, um, get your learn on.

Class ends at 11:30 and its to my new workplace at the newspaper at 12:00 with the Sonic Corndog somewhere in there, in between. Work is nice. Fast paced. Get it done and get it done everyday because newspapers are an everyday thing. You don’t get behind.

The people there have been swell and nice from the start, and surprisingly maintain this treatment towards my person even though they’ve already found out that I’m frequently of the moron type.

Then on Mondays I leave work at 5:00 and drive to my night class in Hot Springs. Its at 6:00.

Lasts till 8:30

Then to my other so-called job at the gym. Moms got the cleaning contract there. It’s a nice big new place.

I clean, vacuum, get trash, watch tv, clean, play basketball, wipe glass, and watch tv.

I wear a back-pack vacuum cleaner. Tonight I stooped to drink from the water fountain while I had the big pack-pack thing on my back, running, sucking, ..whatever. I imagined the water from the fountain draining down my throat and at the midway point between my tongue and stomach, the water being ionized or atomically altered by the big 120-volt spinning electromagnet that I have strapped to my spine.

Mondays are busy.

I left work at 11:30, and got home at 12:10.

Slept.

...Getting back from a vacation, of sorts. Skiid just about every day and saw 13 inches of snow fall in 1.5 days, I did. It was a nice week in New Mexico and after that, a nice week in Colorado. Skied Angel Fire. Skied Wolf Creek. Skied Crested Butte.

Come home flat broke and financially destitute.

Altitude does strange things to sleeping habits, and to eating habits.

I think the only television I watched during the entire two weeks, involved the weather channel (for the snow reports) and a special Taser-Gun edition of Cops.

Getting back to my normal routine, out of vacation mode, I have come to the idea that there is definately one thing wrong with me.

I devote entirely too much attention and thought and observation and contemplation to the media, to the spewage of , ...of, infotainment.

Its like a trance, sometimes, for me.
Why pay so much mind to it all, ...to something that kicks up and down, back and forth, like “waves tossed by the sea” ...exactly.

The idea is to do something different. To unplug. To live.

Learn to be still.

I’d be better off.

Less of a drone, less “saturated.”

More of an actual person.